Charlotte and Adam Discuss: In Which We Discover that Cyndi Lauper is God and Prince is Christ

Charlotte: Maybe this is just college withdrawal, but lately I’ve been wanting to write an analytical paper.

Adam: At Thanksgiving, we were talking about writing papers, and I started to pine a little, I’ll admit.
Did I ever brag to you about the title of my IR theory paper?

Charlotte: Nope, let’s hear it.

Adam: For the final paper in ‘Theories of International Relations’ we had to choose one theory and explain a historical event with that theory. But we had also studied Feminist Critical Theory, and we had the option of choosing that and examining another theory through it. Which is what I chose to do, since it seemed like it would be more fun than the alternative. So I critiqued an essay called ‘The Fungibility of Power’ through the feminist perspective, and titled my paper ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fungibility.’ ZING

Charlotte: WHOOOAAAAA
Hahahahahahahhahaha
I’m surprised the building you were in didn’t explode with the power of that zing.

Adam: That was the last paper i wrote in college.

Charlotte: Went out with a zing.

Adam: Hahaha. The professor like it a lot. Not the paper as much as the title.
One other person in the class did the feminist perspective, and she was the only other person to use a joke title.

Charlotte: Feminists are hilarious. Everyone knows this.

Adam: Known for their ribald senses of humor.

Charlotte: And zinging abilities. This would be obvious to anyone who really thought about burning bras.
FUNNY.

Adam: I, of course, had ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ stuck in my head the entire time I was writing the paper.

Charlotte: Did this help or hinder the process?

Adam: Haha, probably hindered. Though maybe it helped. I did graduate college.

Charlotte: All thanks to Cyndi Lauper.
Well, maybe not “all.”

Adam: Haha, who knows. She and her colorful hair works in mysterious ways.

Charlotte: She helped the Goonies.

Adam: Wouldn’t that be a profound disappointment? If you died and wound up at the gates of heaven only to find that all this time, Cyndi Lauper was God?

Charlotte: Hahahaha.
I don’t know if I would be disappointed to have a god that wrote a song about female masturbation. I think pleasantly surprised?

Adam: Haha, by that criteria, maybe Prince is Jesus.

Charlotte: Hahahahahahahhaahhahaaha.
He has reached many people. I don’t know if he’s saved anyone with his phallic guitar, but I wouldn’t be surprised! All of his disciples are named Pearl, and Ruby, and Appollonia. . .

Adam: And just like Jesus, he rides a giant purple motorcycle!

Charlotte: You’d think he’d have a better cover name than “Prince.” Or maybe that’s the genius of it.

Adam: Prince is Jesus. That’s WHY he’s named Prince! Short for ‘Prince of Peace.’

Charlotte: Prince said unto his disciples, “Take and eat, for this is my funk, given unto you.” You know, you’d think we all would have figured this out by now.

Adam: It’s been right there in front of us all this time:
The name, the motorcycle, the sick guitar chops…

Charlotte: The relentless funk, the resilience, the ability to write a hit song without any bass. . .
Although his latest album. . . not so good. For the son of God, anyway.

Adam: Christ was tempted in the desert. With not so great chord changes…

Charlotte: Hahahaha. And dumb lyrics.
I’m glad we got to the bottom of this. I’m gonna have to rethink Christmas a little bit.

Adam: Make your presents a little bit funkier?

Charlotte: My tree is gonna be decked out in crushed purple velvet

Adam: Hahahahahaha

Charlotte: Yes.
I will wear a frilly blouse, just as Prince does. And eye liner.

Adam: Go with Cyndi Lauper, my child.

Charlotte: I don’t have enough bleach. Or tutus.

Prince & The Revolution – Darling Nikki (Buy It)

Prince – The Cross (Buy It)

Prince – Chelsea Rodgers (Buy It)

posted by Adam and Charlotte

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3 responses to “Charlotte and Adam Discuss: In Which We Discover that Cyndi Lauper is God and Prince is Christ

  1. I read this as I work on my senior thesis and other papers. Do you really miss it? Do you? Either way, I’m pretty sure the laughter has woken me up enough to bang out a few more pages before I crash. Thank you thank you.

    PS- Happy Hannukah, Adam!

  2. Honest Injun’ I miss it, and I can only assume that Charlotte wasn’t lying to me through gchat (which would be unforgivable). Good luck on finals, and if I knew how to say ‘thank you’ in Hebrew, I’d say it here.

  3. Adam – it’s Todah Rabah.

    you’re welcome.

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